The thoughts in this post are inspired by an eye-opening incident that happened recently to a person close to me which could have potentially ruined his life, but thankfully it didn’t go through. However, it was clear to him afterwards that he needed to take a different approach to his life, particularly, a one that caters more for the blessings around him and less for taking these blessings for granted.

While researching this subject, I wanted to find out exactly whether there’s a hardwiring in human genetics that makes them appreciate blissful things less as time goes by. Dr. David Brandt, author of Is That All There Is?: Balancing Expectation and Disappointment in Your Life, concisely explains this phenomenon:

Human beings have a curious capacity to take things for granted. The most exquisite diamond loses its luster with familiarity. The most compatible intimate becomes boring. Miracles like the daily sunrise fail to astonish because they’re commonplace! Repetition and time dull our sense of wonder.

We endow novelty with powers and attributes that it does not really possess. When a thing becomes familiar to us, the mystery we have projected onto it is lost. We see it without the overlay of our imaginings.

The irony in this idiosyncrasy of human character is that we are disappointed by the very things that used to excite us. The once new job or leisure activity is now tedious. We feel let down rather than uplifted. Disappointment is a consequence of our expectation that an object or event will continue to provide us with stimulation regardless of how constant our contact. Unless we adjust our expectations accordingly, we will continue to feel deflated.

I think what we all should agree on is the fact that this is a natural “idiosyncrasy of human character”, a one we’re all born with. The basic fact remains that we all love things when they’re new, shiny and exciting and gradually begin to lose interest as we get increasingly familiar with their effect in our lives.

The differentiating factor then becomes: to what extent do we take these things for granted, and whether or not we get the chance to realize that (and hopefully do something about it) before it’s too late?

And just to be clear, “things” here may refer to anything of materialistic, inspirational or spiritual value in our lives, even things that are out of our control like the sun we enjoy everyday and the sound of ocean waves that we love so much.

Speaking for myself, I believe that my defensive lifestyle, the one that prompts me to have low expectations of others, helps me to appreciate the good things that do come my way, and the good things that are already there. I always wonder how my life would be if I didn’t have such wonderful parents who are always around, some amazing friends who are just in it for “me”, and a God-given healthy body that gets sick too few times around the year. I don’t see these and other things as ones I’m born with or destined to have, I see them as things that other people may not have and I’m such a lucky person if I do have them.

It’s certainly not easy to always keep reminding ourselves to look out for and appreciate the blessings we take for granted. But for starters, let’s look at things we do have that others are dying for. If you have got yourself a loving wife or husband that have shown you nothing but love and care over the years you’ve been married to them, think about other people (you may or may not know) who are still struggling with dysfunctional and failed marriages and relationships. Think about how lucky you are you found the person who, for once, loves you for what you are and who you want to be. Now tell me, how often do people get to experience this wonderful feeling of intimacy to another human being. I can you tell from my own short-lived experiences, very few, if any. So tell me now, is it fair to assume that what you have is something we’re all supposed to have, or are you really that lucky to have it.

Just coming to this last realization, we start to question ourselves: well if I’m really that lucky, how can I hold on to it? What things can I do to show my gratitude and appreciation for having this blessing in my life?

Well congratulations my friend! If you really do care to ask yourself this question, then you’re on the right track. By just spotting those things that need your attention and appreciation, you can start to develop plans that aim to regularly find ways to cater for their presence in your life.

So why wait any longer? Let’s get up, look around us, and let every single good thing we’re blessed with know how much we care!